You Are Not a Light Switch
Photo by Steve Johnson on Unsplash
Stop thinking like one. Work to move away from being “on” or “off” your program.
There is so much negative language around food choices and dieting. Food is good or bad. We are on the program or off. We have been bad or good. Describing food or ourselves with such black and white adjectives will get us nowhere. Cake is not bad. We are not bad if we eat cake, nor are we necessarily “off” our program.
The fact is not that cake is bad, but that it’s only redeeming quality is that it is delicious. It has no nutritional value, and is high in fat, sugar, and calories. But, cake symbolizes celebrations, good times, milestones. So eating cake can be a part of your program if you decide that you want it to, without labeling or judging yourself.
These are typical comments that I frequently hear:
“My friends came into town for the weekend and I was bad.”
“I did not exercise at all this week - I was bad.”
“I was so good this week - how come I did not lose any weight?”
“I was being so good then my (husband, son, daughter, coworker, boss) wanted me to go out with them and I was bad.”
The mental energy required by thinking that you are good/bad, on/off is depleting and demoralizing. This way of thinking, and this way of working towards a balanced and healthy lifestyle puts you in the space of constantly judging and second guessing yourself. And occupying that mental state will prevent real change.
For example, you overate at dinner. You feel guilty about that and then you decide to have dessert as well because - what the heck - you were already “bad".”
Instead, you could acknowledge that you overate at dinner. But instead of just feeling bad, you think about what led to that overeating (old habits, wanting to fit in, feeling deprived, unconsciousness) and make your very next decision a good one. No dessert. Follow that great decision with acknowledgement that you have all the power.
There are going to be slip ups. There are going to be times when you feel like you have lost control. There are going to be times that you feel lonely in your journey. There are also going to be successes - feelings of control, power, transformation, and self discipline.
The more consistent you are with your habits and routines, the less you will inhabit this space of black and white thinking, and instead embrace the gray where the true success can be achieved. Pair consistent behaviors with getting to the bottom of the stories you tell yourself around food, and you will be on the road to success.
