The Between Times
Next steps are unclear.
In all honesty, the writing this week has been difficult. I sat down more than once at the beginning of the week, and stayed at my desk writing, but nothing felt right, or hit the right tone. So I am writing about where I am right now.
These last few weeks have been a bit of struggle for me because I am in one of my “between times.” My between times have come and gone for many years now and they can be really HARD. They often happen after big transitions once the dust has settled, but sometimes they happen with just the ordinary monotony of life. They are usually characterized by a stretch of time where I feel sad, bored or lethargic (or all three). Sometimes they are busy but nothing is new or fun, sometimes they are just boring and feel like a holding place - somehow, waiting for the next thing to happen.
Having struggled with mild depression, and seeing some of the same feelings coming up during these times, I know that I need to consciously pay attention to how my day plays out or I just end up watching too much TV, not doing much of anything and feeling worse. Here are the 3 things I focus on:
Most important - I stick with the routines and habits (rules-for-success) that keep my body healthy and my mind mentally balanced.
I make a point of interacting and talking with at least one other human being outside of my home.
I create or do something with my hands every day (cook, sew, knit, garden).
Additionally, I think my personal between time right now is exacerbated by our national between time. We are waiting for what happens next with covid, with schools, with the election, with live theater, with travel, with socializing, with remote work, with the economy, with how the holidays will look - and on and on.
I have found that my between times seem to be largely out of my control - they just come up and give me a chance to reset in some way, and that is true of our collective between time as well.
In this space I work to avoid any sort of one size fits all solution because so often it does not. But, if you are having a between time, the strategies I rely on are widely recognized by a variety of experts as easy and straightforward ways to help you assert a sense of control over your life when times are hard. Here’s a short list...
Make your bed, get outside in nature, eat nutritionally dense foods, connect with friends and family, avoid too much alcohol, sugar or screen time, do something you enjoy.
The between times pass. Next steps become more clear. Stay present.
